Valentine’s Day, the day of love and affection can be quite a challenge for a dad. How do you create the time to be a couple and not just parents? How do you make sure your best-laid plans aren’t ruined by some last-minute panic or change of plans? How do relight the fire that brought you together when you’re knee-deep in dirty nappies, nursery bills, and washing?
Let’s start with the gifts.
You want to make sure that you get your loved ones something special, but you also don’t want to break the bank.
My advice? Skip the jewellery and chocolates, and instead get creative!
One year, I made my wife a voucher book filled with different tasks and activities I would do for her, like cooking her favourite dish (fish pie!), giving her a foot rub, or even a one-time-only-no-notice-required “give me the house to myself” voucher.
She loved it, and because the vouchers were to be used on demand it took some of the pressure off and she used them at times when it was appropriate.
When she felt happy and relaxed she could cash in an appropriate voucher.
Another time when she was perhaps more stressed, a different voucher would do the trick.
Now, let’s talk about making some quality time for each other.
It can be difficult to find quality time together with busy schedules and the responsibilities of parenthood. So here are three tips on how to create time for each other on Valentine’s Day:
- Get up early.
Valentine’s Day can be a busy day for many couples, but why not start the day early and enjoy a quiet breakfast together before the kids wake up. - Have a stay-at-home date night.
Instead of fighting for a table at a restaurant, why not have a cozy night in?
Cook a romantic meal together, pop some champagne, and enjoy a movie or board game when the kids are tucked up in bed.
If cooking’s not your thing, or you don’t have time, just remember the ultimate dad hack – order a takeaway and confidently pretend you made it yourself! - Take a break from technology.
Leave your phones, laptops, and other distractions behind, and focus on each other. You’ll be surprised how much more connected you feel.
And last but not least, let’s talk about the romantic side of Valentine’s Day.
You want to show your loved ones how much you care, but you also don’t want to overdo it.
My tip?
- Keep it simple and sincere.
One year, I just made up a geeky poster of memes and equations and sayings about love – printed it and popped it a frame. It was a simple gesture and cost pennies, but it meant a lot to her because it was bespoke and talked about love in the geeky/sciency way we both enjoy looking at the world!
Just don’t try to be too cheesy, unless you’re ready for the consequences.
In conclusion, Valentine’s Day might be more of a challenge being a parent, but if you decide to do it then always remember to have fun with it.
As the famous poet William Shakespeare once said, “If music be the food of love, play on.” Or was it, “If pizza be the food of love, Deliveroo?”
Either way, the point is to make the most of this special day and enjoy it with your loved one. And don’t forget that despite gifts and activities, the most important thing about Valentine’s Day is to remember to show you care. It costs nothing, and for some it can mean more than the world.
